Day 74
Community is getting hard, but God is more and more faithful every day.
So this has been the latest struggle: feeling out of place in transit and having nothing to offer and thus feeling unwanted and un-needed. Totally lies. After the disaster that was last night, I woke up late and feeling isolated and irritable. Again. I spent some time cleaning up my space and being silent rotating my thoughts and feelings around my head. That didn’t really change everything. So I decided to get out of the house to drink some coffee and read some Bible. I started getting little texts as I was leaving (from everyone but the one person I was craving them from), and I started seeing God using people to encourage me. And it was raining! And today was supposed to be sunny and bright. How beautiful is that? I see it as a little love note from Him, just a little chin up petite guerrier-jeune mariée (thank you!).
When I got to double-shot, the first person I saw was sweet Johanna, looking desperately London-chic. We hugged and small talked and finally I worked up the nerve to ask her if we could talk (because, once again, I really really needed to talk to someone about all of this). So after I got my coffee she sat down with me…
